Swear Jar

Blonde Robot prides itself on straight talking.
No corporate jibber-jabber!
In our office we have a swear jar. Not for four letter words but for over the top corporate mumbo-jumbo. We like to say what we mean and mean what we say.
And yes, the swear jar is real. All proceeds go directly to charities such as the Royal Flying Doctor Service, The Salvation Army Xmas appeal and other worthy causes.

Therefore we will never:

• Promote synergy
• Give unrealistic percentages (we respect physics so nothing over 100% here)
• Think outside the box
• Run it up the flag pole
• Promote a symbiotic relationship
• Have a unique value proposition
• Pick the low hanging fruit
• Step back and take a helicopter view
• Refer to people as a resource. Oil is a resource.
• Promote organic growth. We don’t sell vegetables
• Reach out. If we want to speak to you we will call you.
• Take that offline
• Circle back to that
• Thought leadership.
• Have things that are “in our wheelhouse”. But there is definitely stuff that we don’t know!
• Reinvent the wheel
• Promote a “Game changer”
• Touch base. But we will say hi!
• Get our ducks in a row. Those crazy ducks should know what they are doing already!

And our favourite:

We will never promote an open kimono relationship

Whoever thought flashing your genitals at each other as the perfect way cement a business relationship is messed up in the head. That this phrase has established itself into the corporate vernacular is equally disturbing.

We shake hands. We prefer it that way.

_{Got some jibber-jabber that makes you laugh? Email it to us at sales@blonde-robot.com.au and it might make the list!}